Many people today feel sorrow for many kind of reasons and problems such as losing parents, relatives, losing jobs and so on. Sorrow indeed is an unwholesome mental fact of suffering, as taught by Buddha. Hatred will appear in consequence. They endanger the mind and are painful forces and influence; one in no way gains anything from these. They burn the heart and harm the mind without yielding a single benefit. Therefore a wise person should avoid it.
There is a story, as taught by Buddha, which is about Malika, the wife of General Bandula who serve for the King Kosala. The couple had sixteen twin (thirty-two) sons but all, including father, are killed by king in a house by fire, as the king feel afraid of the day when they would conspire him.
The next day of killing, when Malika was about to offer alms to a venerable monks, the bad new arrived. Indeed the loss was really great, but she didn’t suffer from lament at all and carried one with her meritorious deed without showing sign of grief and sorrow.
Although she love her husband and sons, yet she controlled herself by the good thoughts of meritorious deeds at hand. In our life, we have to face hundreds of problems although we couldn’t live a hundred years. Therefore everyone should try to subdue pain and sorrow, grief and lamentation by all means because we get no benefits from weeping. It can destroy human health and mind.
What we should do is to prepare and do the best what we have to before too late. We need to repay the debts to our parent before they die. If we are doing so the best, no way we need to tear down and weep and no sorrow.
Whenever in the face of sorrow, we should reason like this, “How complete is my fulfilment of perfection?”, as the way Buddha faced in his past existences. You should now stop wasting time for sorrow and do everything the best before too late. Even if it is late, let it be and follow the teaching of Buddha such as giving, radiation loving-kindness, taking meditation, etc, to repay the debts by all the way you can.
Note: I refer you to read the book ‘Abhidham in Daily’ in which the story is written.
Author: Aung Kham
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